Raleigh – Governor McCrory is back in the news again for another bathroom law. This time instead of going up against a large city he is fighting a quaint little hamlet known as Wanchese. Apparently the village’s no shoes, no shirt, no problem attitude has run afoul with the Governor’s strict sensibilities. He gave a speech to the general assembly this afternoon:
“My fellow lawmakers, we must act and act quickly before this type of behavior spreads to other towns and cities. Just imagine someones bare feet in a bathroom.” The Governor paused to shudder in disgust. “Those feet need to be in shoes. Sandals at the very minimum. Socks are not acceptable!” He shouted, visibly upset. “I have worked hard to show the rest of the nation how North Carolina is a high class forward looking state, but what do you think the other state will say when they hear about this? Will they still look to North Carolina as a forerunner of civilized thinking? Plus the pH in urine is all wrong for your foot skin.”
Our reports show that the Wanchese law is not really a law, but more of an understanding. If you aren’t worried about getting your feet dirty, then who cares. When asked if this is just another instance of the government needlessly regulating people’s lifestyles, we were promptly escorted out of the Tiki Bar.