Kill Devil Hills – Barbara Alsnoght took to the Local Facebook group to demand a closure to the immensely popular Aviation Skate Park this week. Apparently she has different opinions than other people on parenting, and thinks letting children play without strict supervision is a recipe for disaster.
“You should have heard the language out of their mouths,” She said as she gesticulated hand movements to emphasize her astonishment, “They were rude to my child who wanted to play on the box in the park! He has just as much a right to ride his razor scooter over the bumps and dohickeys as they have.”
Other parents joined in to express their displeasure at the urban music being played. “I’m not trying to sound like an old person,” said local old person Stephen Warners, “but this rap stuff they listen to isn’t even music. Its all F this and F that and N-word this and that. Not to mention how it objectifies women. It’s not something I want my children listening to,” he said as he gestured to his young boys in the back seat of his car while 95.3 played a Motley Crue song.
“I just want to be able for my child to be able to go everywhere and never be exposed to anything I don’t like,” said fellow outraged mother, Sharron Harrell, “Is that too much to ask?”
When some people, who obviously don’t know what it’s like to have kids, decided to defend the skate park the discussion got heated. They tried to point out a lot things that were not wrong, but in no way changed how angry those parents were.
“I don’t care what they say,” Alsnoght continued to argue, “if other people’s children don’t behave the way I want, I think I should be able to punish them. That goes for young adults hanging out there too. These millennials are so entitled that they think they can defy me when I demand they behave how I want them to in public! How dare they exercise their freedom of speech and expression when I don’t like it. Close the park!”
“My son is on the football team, and he assures me that there is no cussing or bullying going on there,” said another angry mother, “maybe we should put these delinquents on the football team so they can learn some character. My husband plays golf with his friends, and they tell me that there is no bullying or cursing there either. If we close the park maybe they will take up a real sport.”
“There are only 4 other playgrounds within a mile of the park. Where am I supposed to take my kid to play and not have them exposed to these feral children. What are their parent’s thinking by letting them make their own decisions? This is what happens when you let your children eat gluten.”
“We all go through that phase,” said KDH Officer Steve Follwer, “I had a Black Flag shirt when I was in high school, and my hair almost grew past my ears! I go over there occasionally and mix it up with the kids, and let them know I’m still cool and they can talk to me.” When asked how his department plans to chaperon the park he said, “are you serious? We have real work to do. Anyway, skateboarding isn’t a crime! I had that T-shirt too in high school, and a Bob Marley one, but don’t print that. I don’t want the boss to know about that phase.”
Still people were not relenting with their demands that all public places meet their standards or be closed. One agitated parent even went as far to demand the public beach access by her house should be closed because too many “Colington” people gathered there. “Surely you see how a few anti social deviants can ruin a place so completely, that there is no hope of anyone else ever having fun their again,” she continued, “If we allow just one person to misbehave without shutting down these places, we will have ceded our island to Satan.” (Editor’s Note: Satan was unavailable for comment, even after I sacrificed numerous small creatures to him. Apparently he is still mad about getting fooled by the Cantore story.)
“It’s these entitled millennials!” said another commenter, ” They got a trophy even if they were losers, and now they demand the same rights that were afforded to us by our parents generation! What arrogance! We just want them to follow social norms just like us Gen X-ers did.”
Unfortunately the local skaters had not much to say on the issue. When The Report asked why they didn’t comment, a local skater in beanie replied, “because I’m not joining some dumbass Facebook group, my hobby is skating, not bitching on social media,” then he put on sunglasses, took a pull of a cigarette and skated away like a badass.
The only one whos comment made any sense was the cops. The jesus lady is a total kook. The genx comment guy saying we as genxers followed social norms, uh no we didnt.We had mohawks and combat boots and listened to the Dead Kennedys. The motley crue guy saying that rap is mysogonistic. Well this is true but motley crue is just as womanizing. Dont make me break out their lyrics. This sounds like a clear case of snobery, and religiosity.
Wow, a whole lot of adults putting children down in one form or another. I don’t see and have never seen negativity out there with any age child or adult. I see everyone taking turns, etc. Music, he complained about rap while listening to Motley Crew, that’s funny and no comment on that one. Come on. When you take the play away you lead children to drugs. I’d rather my child say a cuss word learning a new trick on a professional sport such as BMX Biking and skate boarding — to you that said they needed to find a real sport. Do you watch TV? I encourage any child to go out and succeed their dreams if if fits your eyes or not…. Your taste in sports or music. It sounds to me, that you, that one trying to take it away, is the one who needs a life. They seem to be enjoying their freedom and sport.
You are correct. This is called satire, and was most likely written by one of the skaters to illuminate what they perceived as hypocrisy. I doubt the mother actually said what was quoted. It is more likely paraphrased to say what the teens chose to hear, rather than what she actually said.
An older generation criticizing the younger generation for expecting things to be handed to them while complaining about how they can’t have what they want. People who were teenagers in the 70-80s can’t complain about how modern generations are hooligans, the highschool drop out rate was 3 times higher then and they defined the term counterculture.
This is a great story! The only problem is that it’s all too true. Kooks, you can’t get away from them and you can’t run over them with your truck.
Build a park like this for the kids.
That’s so funny everybody raise your kid to Ms. Alsnoghts’s standards. So when she goes out in public the world is just how she likes it. I’m sure if you do this she will help support your kids financially.Let’s close the park right out the gate how i. Born and raised here(well born at Chowan county hospital-obx hospital wasn’t around in the 70’s)grew up on 8th ave off airport rd. My friends wished we had as much places like this. Leave the skaters alone. By the way the YMCA has a skate park,it’s probably a little tamer. Just sayin’
This is total garbage! I am a Millennial with two small children we play at that Park all the time and I happen to enjoy when they play the Red Hot Chili Peppers and watching young adults and older adults rip it up at the skate park they were using curse words but they saw my small children and I heard one girl exclaimed there are babies here! not a big deal I guess she never uses curse words or has maybe has never heard them before. everybody goes through stages growing up, if you can’t be around that you should probably stay at home. you have no right to discipline other people’s children as much as they have a right to discipline yours. stay at home grumpy pants crazy Magoo mom.
My son is very well behaved, doesn’t do drugs, cuss or be disrespectful to anyone. He is at the skatepark almost everyday and has never once been influenced to do anything by the people, music or inconsideration. He is strong enough mentally to see past the peer pressure and influences. Maybe if you stop talking about others children and talk/teach yours. You are fighting a losing battle because someone will listen. If your children are not taught right from wrong then they will be influenced. Get off your soapbox and do YOUR JOB as a parent.
I had to wonder if this article was for real, because the comments of these parents were that ridiculous. They comment on millennials as if they believe entitlement comes from not complying to social norms. Not really. The bad millennial behavior we hear about in the news comes from children growing up with the ideas these people apparently have. “I just want to be able for my child to be able to go everywhere and never be exposed to anything I don’t like”…seriously? As the mother of three grown children, I know that you cannot and should not keep kids from living in the real world for their sake.
Still completely taken aback from such delusional ideas.
The amount of people who don’t realize this is satire is scary.
My son plays soccer, skates, surfs, snowboards etc. Is he a delinquent? He is top of his class and in advanced learning classes.. is he still a delinquent. Let me fill this un educated woman in on something, Whether our children skate, surf, play football, soccer, baseball, or whatever they want to engage in, there is no reason for her to put down everyones children and try to close a park that attracts more people than any park on the beach. It is a shame she had a bad time, i think every park i go to there are people who have music on and use selective language, it is part of the game, the culture of skating but it doesnt make our children bad or delinquents,it makes our children diverse, learn the same thing in different ways. It is YOUR job as a PARENT to steer your child in the right direction and if the direction not to that skatepark.. well go somewhere else.
Hahaha, best local fake story I’ve seen and I’ve lived a lot of places! For someone who appreciates a good bit, Bravo!
Discipline my kids because they don’t behave like he wants them too.
Go ahead and see what happens to your arm.